5.09.2008

Mother's Day

The annual Mother and Daughter Mother's Day Tea was held at my daughter's school last evening. My contribution was jam squares. (Things with jam in the middle are very "tea"-ish I think!)

The squares that remained at home prompted me to get out some of my collected china cups and saucers. The only bridal shower I requested as a bride-to-be was a cup and saucer shower - the kind where each female guest brings a single china cup and saucer that appeals to them and which will remind the bride of them throughout her life whenever she uses it. I am amazed that to this day, this holds true for me - I can match each delicate gift with the woman or girl who gave it to me. I have about three dozen in my collection.
From the time I was a child I loved the order and expectation and symbolism in the ritual of a bona fide Tea Party. I remember recognizing that the niceties of traditional female society had real value and merit. I loved that with cup and saucer in hand women stood or sat and chatted differently than at a dinner or a picnic or over cocktails on the beach at the cottage etc. and in particular that men would adopt a different stance as well when they were, on occasion invited into such a circle.Women who know me are generally stunned at my views on this. (My keen interest in knitting of course also elicits a similar response.)

I've never felt the need to assert myself as equal, valuable or accomplished by eschewing the feminine social traditions. Rather I've always unashamedly held them up as worthy of continuation and celebration. (Again, knitting is a major element of this!)

In society of course traditional Motherhood has undergone significant transformation. I followed an intensely career-centred direction prior to becoming a mother for the first time but since have chosen a life that in day to day content closely mirrors that of my grandmothers.

Through all of the physical, intellectual and social challenges full time motherhood has presented, the grace, artistry and pride with which previous generations of women undertook this role has been a consistent inspiration.

So last night I went to the Tea where I was proud to note that my jam squares were well received. This morning I hand rolled three skeins of yarn into deliciously soft centre pull balls after serving and cleaning up breakfast for one and all and ironing my Beloved a shirt. With the completion of this post I will put on my heels and head out to do the errands that will allow my family to enjoy a weekend together opening our little cottage for the season. Up in the wild woods (we have no road - we have to boat everything in after launching and getting the motor to run for the first time in months) I will work much of the weekend dressing and working like a man. Bugs, dirt, firewood, hauling stuff into and out of the place. It's going to be great! I have no limits! I honour and learn from the past. I use the freedom of the present to live a life such that I am proud of it all!

As for Mother's Day, whatever the acknowledgements or lack thereof I will spend it so as to be the best mother I can to my children, a worthy and full partner to my Beloved, a major contributor to the quality of our life together. For my mother I will try to finish, by Sunday evening, the STR socks she asked me to make for her in yarn she picked out last week. I really can't say I'm in love with the colourway but I'm going to knit to her specifications on nothing else this weekend until they are done.

The colours in this yarn, especially the red reminds me of rubber bands. It doesn't translate at all into the knitted fabric though! That yellowy brown and dirty green seems to dominate instead. I hope she still likes her choice once the socks are done!

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